*Poof*

Hmm..i upgraded my blog..thn can see view counters =D
and i dont know why..
this post have 7,981 Pageviews 
http://ryansmiserablelife.blogspot.com/2010/05/i-love-you-my-baby-girl.html
wth? ~.~

well...at least i know i'm not blogging to the air xD

So sad....

Its 5:25am =.=

don't know why i cant sleep

so i just surf youtube. i subscribed to this guy who tell his stories while playing maplestory...

i know i know...you probably saying this 'maplestory? wtf? small boy ah?'

i like listening to his stories..its sometimes nice! and kinda funny ^^

anyways..i stumble upon this video...and its a really really sad video...

i actually erm..kinda..tear-ish :\ shut up! i have feelings too! D: dont judge me! lol

here's the vid

don't have to watch the video..just listen..

College

New enviroment, new friends...

Hopefully still will keep in touch with my current friends

so everytime I hang out with them, I will hang out like its the last time that I will ever see them

I forget where I heard this before 'Live like its your last day' << i prefer this then 'Live life to its fullest' cuz its much more meaningful and easy to understand

Life...what is life? how can I live life to its fullest when I don't even understand the meaning of it?

Few more days then my mum have to go for her chemotherapy...

Hopefully during those 5years nothing bad will happen ba

because i haven't make her proud of me

all this years the most closest to me is my mum

I always talk to her about stuffs. Stuffs that I don't talk to my dad or bro

Its funny how time really can change someone

I used to really hate my dad

But now I seriously appreciate him more then ever

Without him maybe I will just blur blur study shitty things that I don't give a fuck about and everyday working like lifeless dog without passion or anything..just blurface work all the way

Pa and Ma..1day I will make you guys proud of me. I know I always lets u guys down all this years of studying because I no interest in what i studying.

And now I'm studying culinary. Something that I really have interest in.

I owe this all to MIKE.

When I was 10/11

I was amazed that guys can cook other then instant noodles LOL

1st time and the last time I see you cook is Tomato Fried Rice

And just because of that simple thing

I loved cooking..although I'm not good at it because I don't really have the utensils for it :\

That day I texted you and say I wanted to start over again with you

and you kept saying I was drunk

I know you know I wasn't joking about it

I guess...I really make you lose your trust in me...

the next day when I woke up, weng and wai leong still sleeping

I saw my scar and it reminds me of you, then I got really upset and kept thinking why did I leave you that time...so i just keep drinking only :\

But atleast this scars remind me to don't judge someone so fast..especially my girlfriend

so I owe it to you and I'm sorry that you have to be that girl that I've hurt to make me realize that I was wrong.

21st March 2012 :)

It's Sam here to help Ryan to blog. I'm so the super duper sleepy already and he's forcing me to blog for him. Danggggg -.- Anyway, had a great day&night with Ryan and the bunch of best friends at Eastin Hotel on spm results day :) Sometimes, a small party with just few of your best friends is much more fun than having a big party with a bunch of not so close friends. Me and Ryan got addicted into mixing drinks, the bartender wanna be, haha! Miss that night, the games and the drinks already btw :/ Thanks for accompanied me to somewhere in the middle of night, you know where. :) Hopefully there's gonna be a night like this again!

New toys :P

Stupid face :D

At the park of Damansara Idaman in the middle of night. -.-

Good night.

The song just for you!

For sammy ^^

GG!

Continue study or Work.

all depends on result :\

if later i going out with sam they all..

play like theres no tmr

play like I'm not going to see them for a long time

Stop asking me to cut my hair please! TQ ^^

Finally did it :\

after so long..

my friends keep saying that i should break up but i keep waiting hope you will notice that i'm still there...but i guessed not D:

i think i send quite a long msg to break up lols

good? bad? who cares rite? its over haha

texted her(not exgf) yesterday but i think she stressed gua :\

dont really dare to talk to her anymore cuz last few weeks she very very VERY angry at me

just woke up then i saw sam's tweet D:

everyone have secrets...tried to hint u to give up liao...

so stop torturing yourself k? no more bf/gf..friends will always be there for you =)

...DAFUQ?!

D: i always look around me..im getting so paranoid...

someone is stalking me :'(

her name is Samantha Cheng..beware!

lol jkjk

last thursday went out with sam,weng and sharma ^.^

its really nice to see them after so long haha

i cant really remember why...but dono what they say then I emo

so i went to buy ciggy

mana tau 1day I smoke so much :\ more thn 10sticks d..omg

say Rachel at mcd oso =) wanted to hug her but it will feel awkward D: so i didnt

she like dowan talk to me only..haiz

what kind of relationship am I in?

yesterday I read her blog...

and it fucking annoys me that she write xxx is gentleman? and not falling for him?

seriously? are you fucking kidding me? ==

if your not falling for him then write the name la

b4 I couple with you..I know this day will come..

and yet I still chose to be with you

thought you might be the one...haiz

and you wrote that you hope your phone stop receiving messages cuz you want to study

sure thats why I rarely even text you cuz your always studying..which is good

but when your not...do you even have the slightest thought of me in your head?

I guess not...

My friends always say your not appreciating me and blablabla

do you know why I ignore them although their my bestfriends?

cuz I fucking love you..dont you see? i guess not rite?

is it the end of our relationship? should I end it? should I wait? I seriously dont know..

I leave it all to you

listening to this song when writing this post lols <3